Tea
by Carmen Echo
Summary: Rated R for mild language and later chapters. Short, sharp and clinical angst. Hermione likes Fred, it's not returned, and I suck at summaries. Please R&R.
1. Prologue

Tea

Sixth Year

Prologue

This is the first of my Drinks series and it won't be too long. Inspiration for this is very lazy. It will come slowly and the chapters will be short. Hope it won't be too bad...

------

The fear chokes me.. Strangles me and I try to scream and swear and kick and scream some more but I can't... I'm not weak.. I swear on my life I'm not weak... Maybe a little... But not so much.. I can't do it though... It's paralyzing and enabling me to move all at once and I comply to it's every beck and call even though I'm so damn proud... I back away shaking.. My whole body shivvering like a dry and wrinkled leaf that's holding onto the twig for dear life in the wind... The life of a perfect little girl that gets the best grades and polishes off her four-scroll essay until the wee hours of the morning presses down on me.. On my pathetic existance and I fall.. It seems to be a fucking cliff right there and I just fall.. And I can almost taste the pain and the sound of the back of my head hitting the cement... I don't even know if it's cement... I'm an inch above the ground and in another mili-second I'll probably die...

But I wake up...

Oh shit I had homework! No. False alarm. There's no school. I felt my whole body shake violently as I got up to close the fucking window that some asshole left wide open in the middle of the night. That asshole was me.

It was late summer-almost-fall. The bloody windowsill was already covered in a light layer of warm raindrops. I closed it and wiped the cold sweat off of my forehead with the sleeve of my night-gown.

_This is pathetic._ The sardonnic thought in my mind grinned and bounced around baring short sharp little teeth. It was five in the fucking morning and I was wide awake curled up in a ball on my bed. And then I remembered that I leave to Hogwarts tomorrow. Well today. The thought comforted me and calmed my psychotic brain. That place scared me and tempted me all at once. It was like the love I never had for it. Just a desperate need to get away from this inane Muggle world. It's been almost a sinful sanctuary for it's students. People like Ron got caught and got what they deserved. People like Fred Weasley on the other hand. Never. Ever. Ever got caught. Never got in trouble. But did everything that they possibly could to cause it. With the flaming auburn hair and dancing blue eyes and completely crazy laughter. Adrenaline-infused and rebellious Fred and his brother always managed to walk on water, come out clean, do the impossible... Get away with murder - almost. And freckles. Fred had freckles. So did George but Fred's were more distinct. The kind of freckles that you just wanted to... I cut off the rest of the thought for my own sake.

My head felt heavy as I slowly stood up and walked to the shower tugging off my night-gown. It covered everything. It was long sleeved and it went down to my ankles and had the ever-so-round neckline that actually met my neck-line. I furiously ripped the old thing while trying to take it off. Then my panties. Those were white and they too covered everything. I didn't own anything lacy or revealing. I didn't DO lingerie. Well I didn't until the last week. I got my birthday money and bought some clothes. Some clothes I knew Fred was bound to notice...

The water was hot. So scorching that my normally pale skin turned a rather curiously spotty shade of pink. I sunk down to the bottom of the bathtub and leaned my head back as the water washed away plastic smiles and magic words like 'please' and 'thank you' and lies. I couldn't charm the gas tank that heated the water to our Muggle house. I couldn't use fucking magic outside of school. So I waited until the water ran cold. And even then I didn't leave the shower. I was just too fucking tired.

I finally decided to get out. Wiping the steamed but strangely cold mirror with my hand I stared at my reflection - deciding that I needed extencive plastic surgery. Or better yet just die. Curl up in a tiny little ball and evaporate into a momentary puff of lavender-scented smoke. Curly/bushy brown hair, of course more on the bushy side. Dark brown eyes. Thick lips. A nice straight nose. High cheekbones. A gently rounded chin. A face sadly closer to round than elegantly oval. An ex-buck tooth. Nothing special. Never anything worth a second glance. Never ever. I wanted to cry, but realized that it was over-rated and femenine.

No more of this good-girl shit. No more extra-credit assignments. No more studying 'till I dropped. I didn't need this. I didn't need the stress. My marks wouldn't have to pummel down to a fail just because I decided to NOT to do the extra fifteen inches of essay. All I needed was him. And tea. Yes. Right about then - a cup of tea would do me good.

-----

There you have the Prologue (note the capital 'p'). Not the most exciting thing I've ever written - yet I hope you guys will like it. Please don't flame, criticize if you absolutely have to. Flames really hurt. No matter how much anyone says they don't care.


	2. Chapter I

Tea

Sixth Year

Chapter I

First chapter. Short, sharp and clinical. Again, not the most eloquent or exciting work. Read it anyway. Maybe you'll have something different to say.

-----

The rain ended. Everything was wet and muddy and nasty.The sky went that retarded grey colour. My fatigued hands were slightly trembling as I held my teacup to my lips. Took a sip. Tasted nothing.

Wisps of slightly wavy sleek hair fell over my eyes and I carelessly brushed them away. My mind was doing little dances inside my head threatening to just jump out of my ears at any given moment.

Shut up and collect yourself.

I was cool and calm. Inside everything was a mess. But Fred wouldn't know because I wouldn't show it to him. And his sexual voice. And his hands. And his- Alright I'll just stop right there...

Mom looked up at me the look of fake concern on her face - dentists practiced that. "Hermione are you all right?"

"I'm fine." I heard myself squeak. I wasn't fine. I was so far from it that the "I'm fine" it seemed too distant to be distinguishable.

No one spoke another word from then on. Getting up I mechanically smoothed down my short plaid skirt. The thin black stockings I was wearing with it reached a few inches over my knees. Pulling the thin grey 'fall' cloak over my shoulders I picked up my trunk and Crookshanks, and after exchanging cold goodbyes with my parents walked to the fireplace in our living room.

I took a pinch of the Floo Powder. "Diagon Alley." I said loudly, and disappeared.

-----

Walking down to Gringotts I mused on the topic of my parents not giving a flying fuck about me. No, well they probably did, but not enough to show any real affection. They were both too much in love with their careers and themselves. In that order.

Taking out some money I opened up the Hogwarts requierments letter. Abscentmindedly I made my way to Flourish and Blotts. Thrusting the parchment into the harassed-looking man's face I sighed and mumbled "Can I please have these books?" He gave me the books and I payed for them. It was like this every year.

Three... Two... One...

"'Mione!" Great... Just what I needed.

"Hi Harry, Ron." I stuck on a nice fresh plastic smile and waved at them.

"How was your summer?" Ron started, then didn't wait for me to answer and kept going "Ours was great! Harry came to stay at The Burrow for the last three weeks!" And on and on he went, but I wasn't really listening.

"Ron!" Mrs. Weasley's shrill voice screwed up his little tirade.

"What mum?" he gave an exasperated sigh. I didn't blame him, just kept smiling. Looking crisp and happy.

"I thought I lost you, don't run off like that. Oh hello Hermione." she smiled jovially and gave me a bone-crushing hug. I kept smiling, though it did take a little more effort with someone virtually trying to squeeze my entrails out of my mouth.

"Hello Mrs. Weasley. It's nice to see you." I replied politely.

"Hermiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiione!" the twins popped up and yelled in unison behind me. I jumped.

"Hi twins.." just too scared to say his name. And I turned, and I smiled, and I acted like nothing was wrong when I looked into his eyes, even though my heart skipped a couple of beats. My stomach did flips and I knew I must have looked like a fag but I was beyond caring.

"I need new dress robes, who wants to come with me to Madam Malkin's?" my voice sounded slightly dreamy and all together foreign even to my own ears.

"I'll come." Fred volunteered smiling. I tried not to smile back like an idiot. It didn't work.

"I'm off to Quality Quidditch Supplies.." Harry threw over his shoulder, pulling George and Ron along with him. Molly just sighed and muttered something about having to pick up Ron's books for him.

"You think this one makes me look fat?" I mumbled walking out of the fitting room in a silverish gray silk dress robe.

"No.. Well, a little around the ass area maybe.." he grinned and I got the sudden urge to chuck something heavy at his head.

"Be honest you asshole!" I grinned because he grinned.

"Don't stress, it looks nice." his grin faded into a smile and as if mirroring his movement so did mine. This not acting like an idiot business was obviously outside my immediate mental grasp.

"I guess I'll take it then." I stated and walked back to fitting room changing into my regular clothes.

I was wearing a white button-up shit, three buttons down - showing a little cleavage, which was probably the reason to Fred's question.

"What's with the new look?"

"You don't like it?" I smirked trying to sound casual.

"No, not that I don't like it.. It's just that.. Its not exactly..You.." He was obviousely having a hard time picking out words.

My defences went up in a snap. "So what? Its not ME to wear short skirts and show a bit of cleavage?" Anger was almost immediate "When I'm the bookworm nobody cares but when I dress like a girl for a change everyone notices and tells me it's not ME. So ME is the person who's gender is only determined by the bushy hair?" taking a breather I sighed and paid for my robes quietly adding "Hey, at least someone noticed."

Fred was caught off guard by my mini-fit.

"You allright there Herms?" he scratched the back of his neck looking slightly concerned.

"I'm just so tired.." there went the whole I'm-not-gonna-show-him-anything. "It's fine really. It's just not my day." He seemed to buy it. No, not really. He didn't buy it. Not at all. But he changed the topic anyway.

-----

After I picked up quills, ink and parchment, Fred and I made out way back to Flourish and Blotts to meet Mrs. Weasley. I acted as relaxed as physically possible and Fred shot smirks at everyone continuing being his mischievous self.

The rest of the shopping trip passed idly bumming around the ice cream parlour. By the time we arrived at King's Cross station I got a headache and it started raining again. The drops were heavy and very, well, wet. They pounded down on the sidewalk and it felt as if I could hear each and every one of them fall. It was driving me up the wall.

Platform Nine And Three Quarters was as usual, crowded with various Hogwarts students and their parents and such. My vision was slowly blurring as I boarded the huge red steam engine along with Harry and Ron. They were both too busy re-living the wonderful experience that was their summer and chomping down dozens of chocolate frogs to notice that I collapsed on the worn leather cushioning of the train compartment and fell fast asleep.

-----

R&R or die. Well not really. Just review please.


End file.
